[ It's nice to know someone well enough to guess at the inner turmoil from the outward emotions. Archie's patient as Horatio stutters his way through a handful of unfinished, then reaches forward to grab him by his waist and tries to pull them down onto the bed. ]
Come on, you great pillock. [ There. Now they're on the bed. Both on the bed and they've kissed and the world hasn't ended. Archie keeps his hands about Horatio's waist but doesn't move to kiss him. There are Thoughts going on inside that head. ]
[Following directions has always been easy. Horatio can stumble through being tugged and a gentle 'come on.' It's easiest when it's Archie, even--someone Horatio trusts even more than he trusts himself.
For a few heartbeats, all he has to do is settle down into Archie's bed. All he has to do is breathe and feel the warmth of the other man's arm around him and focus on how the world isn't falling to pieces, no matter how long the world kept spinning away from having pressed their lips together.
His breath comes a little more slowly and evenly after a moment. His head shifts and dips, briefly pressing in against Archie's temple just briefly for balance.]
[ Horatio is every bit as lovely here as he was standing up. Having their heads bent close together is still delightful. Every moment that this continues not to be a dream is a relief and a miracle.
Archie catches Horatio's elbow and soothes a thumb over the skin. He feels like he can't stop smiling. ]
(The first time with William had been so rushed and fumbling. There had been too much to drink and too little thinking. Every gasping second of delirious joy had weighed like a sharp reprimand in the morning.
Healing from that, setting things right again, had taken time. The nerves still prickled in the back of Horatio's mind that maybe the bones hadn't actually set right, that things really wouldn't be the same if he ever saw the other lieutenant again.)
For a moment, Horatio squeezes his eyes shut and focuses on the certainty of Archie beside him. This is different. This is better. This is the actual luxury of time, of space, of being able to sort through the nervous way Archie's hand at his elbow pleasantly twists his stomach.
[ Archie has rushed into things with more than one person, caught up in a shared connection or a few too many pints. All in all it doesn't worry him. It isn't in him to dwell on those moments of mutual pleasure.
And he likes to think he's past dwelling on the other experiences. ]
I'd be more worried about that if I were a French clipper. [ And even then, he'd be quite willing to put himself in those capable slender hands.
But it does touch something in him that Horatio is worried about this, about doing it right.] So long as... we both say what we're thinking, I doubt we can go wrong.
It's a simple enough thing. It's something most people would manage with barely a thought, shifting whatever it was inside them that stopped the constant rush of words everyone else was apparently walking around holding back.
Other than Horatio, anyway. Really, that was pure speculation, given how infrequently the constant low-level panic howling in his head ever crystallized into actual words.
In its own way, all the same, it's a comfort to know that the slight cant of his head and arch of his brow have meaning to the man across from him. Archie knows every exasperated look, ever flicker of contentment--and, embarrassingly, every slight twinge of discomfort and fear and self-loathing. Archie has been reading the soft 'hm's and 'mm's since nearly the first day they'd met.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2019-07-17 09:15 am (UTC)Come on, you great pillock. [ There. Now they're on the bed. Both on the bed and they've kissed and the world hasn't ended. Archie keeps his hands about Horatio's waist but doesn't move to kiss him. There are Thoughts going on inside that head. ]
Now. What are you thinking?
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Date: 2019-07-21 09:17 pm (UTC)For a few heartbeats, all he has to do is settle down into Archie's bed. All he has to do is breathe and feel the warmth of the other man's arm around him and focus on how the world isn't falling to pieces, no matter how long the world kept spinning away from having pressed their lips together.
His breath comes a little more slowly and evenly after a moment. His head shifts and dips, briefly pressing in against Archie's temple just briefly for balance.]
That I... wasn't thinking.
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Date: 2019-07-30 03:58 am (UTC)Archie catches Horatio's elbow and soothes a thumb over the skin. He feels like he can't stop smiling. ]
It's all right. It'll be all right.
[ Talk to him, Horatio. Please. ]
no subject
Date: 2019-07-31 11:31 am (UTC)[This is new. This is different.
(The first time with William had been so rushed and fumbling. There had been too much to drink and too little thinking. Every gasping second of delirious joy had weighed like a sharp reprimand in the morning.
Healing from that, setting things right again, had taken time. The nerves still prickled in the back of Horatio's mind that maybe the bones hadn't actually set right, that things really wouldn't be the same if he ever saw the other lieutenant again.)
For a moment, Horatio squeezes his eyes shut and focuses on the certainty of Archie beside him. This is different. This is better. This is the actual luxury of time, of space, of being able to sort through the nervous way Archie's hand at his elbow pleasantly twists his stomach.
They can get this right.]
I'd hate you to think I'd... rush this.
no subject
Date: 2019-08-05 12:49 pm (UTC)And he likes to think he's past dwelling on the other experiences. ]
I'd be more worried about that if I were a French clipper. [ And even then, he'd be quite willing to put himself in those capable slender hands.
But it does touch something in him that Horatio is worried about this, about doing it right.] So long as... we both say what we're thinking, I doubt we can go wrong.
no subject
Date: 2019-08-08 02:16 am (UTC)It's a simple enough thing. It's something most people would manage with barely a thought, shifting whatever it was inside them that stopped the constant rush of words everyone else was apparently walking around holding back.
Other than Horatio, anyway. Really, that was pure speculation, given how infrequently the constant low-level panic howling in his head ever crystallized into actual words.
In its own way, all the same, it's a comfort to know that the slight cant of his head and arch of his brow have meaning to the man across from him. Archie knows every exasperated look, ever flicker of contentment--and, embarrassingly, every slight twinge of discomfort and fear and self-loathing. Archie has been reading the soft 'hm's and 'mm's since nearly the first day they'd met.
(Maybe that's enough.)]